Bring Your Children to Work Day
by dramioneshipper
Summary: Challenge response. You will come to rue Bring Your Children to Work Day. T for language


Theme: Mischief in the Ministry  
Genre: Humor  
Pairing:  
-Choice1: No pairing  
-Choice2: RW/Any Character(writers choice)  
Rating: T  
Word Limit: 800-1500words.

Ron Weasley was sitting at his boring office, on a boring day, in the boring Ministry of Magic, at his boring job at International Magical Cooperation. Ironically, the job he had teased Percy for getting that job barely four years before this. And now Percy was Head of Magical Games and Sports.

He looked out of his window. The weather outside was beautiful: blue skies, bright sun, birds chirping…

'Wow, Fanny must be in a good mood today…' he thought, 'probably got laid again.' Fanny was the Head of the Department whose job it was to choose the weather for the day. Ron remembered with a shudder the nine months when Fanny was pregnant…Those were very hard nine months, as the weather swung with her mood. Ron particularly recalled a tornado that had brought in a stray penguin. Said animal had wreaked havoc in his office, relieving himself on important documents and such… Ron still had nightmares about it.

Ron was about to concentrate again on the boring papers in front of him when the door violently slammed open to reveal…no one.

Confused, he stood up and left his desk, only to be tackled by a black haired demon.

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" it screamed as Ron went:

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The small demon was tickling him everywhere, slamming his head into the floor as it screeched. Ron was blinded by unruly black hair and a mouth full of missing teeth bit him everywhere.

Quite as suddenly at it had come down on him, the demon was pulled away. Pansy Parkinson-Finnigan smiled sheepishly at Ron while restraining a squirming 5 year old in her arms.

"Pansy, what the bloody--" Ron started…

"RONALD WEASLEY! What have I told you about using foul language in front of my baby?"

"Not to do it." He grumbled as he sat up. "But what is Cecilia doing here? I thought she was at school during the day, like all the NORMAL 5 year olds!"

Cecilia stopped squirming and looked at Ron with an evil grin.

"Hi Ronnie."

"Ron, you should know it's Bring Your Children to Work Day! Seamus thought she was better off here than in Albany where he's playing his next match." Answered Pansy.

Seamus was going to die.

Ron had barely any time to grumble about the fact before the door slammed open once again, and two red-heads came in.

"Fred? George? What are you two doing here?"

They smiled at each other and started speaking:

"Well, you see Ronniekins…"

"We figured it was Bring Your Children to Work Day…"

"And since you don't HAVE any children…"

"Because you don't HAVE a wife…"

"As you have the romantic skills of a sea-cucumber…"

"And Hermione ran off with Draco…"

"We figured, hey!"

"We'll be your children for the day!"

They beamed at the room, taking a heroic pose as they finished their explanation. Pansy gaped at them. Ron stared wide eyed. Cecilia chewed on the computer cord.

"You…WHAT?"

They were about to start repeating their whole speech when Cecilia blinked up at them and started laughing hysterically.

"HIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHI! Me like DADDY! I dwunk, cause I sees DOUBLE!"

"Cecilia!" breathed Pansy, outraged. But Cecilia had already fled the room laughing.

"She's gone." said Fred.

'That's a good thing, right?" asked George.

Pansy and Ron looked at each other.

"Depends…"

CRASH!

"Oh no…" moaned Pansy as they all rushed out into the corridor. The huge chandelier was smashed to pieces on the floor.

"How does she do that?" asked Ron, shaking his head. "How does a FIVE YEAR OLD do something like that? She's the devil's spawn, Pansy, trust me on this one."

"Nonsense, she's not Draco's. And how does she do it? With a wand, what do you think?"

"You give a 5 year old a wand?" asked Fred.

"No we don't, she stole it from Ronald."

Ron checked his pockets. The wand was not there anymore.

"Damnit!" just as he said that, Cecilia, whom they had not noticed, kicked him hard in the shin.

"LANGUAGELANGUAGELANGUAGE RONNIE!" and she sped off down in the corridor in the direction of…

"Oh no." said Pansy.

"What?" asked the twins.

"She's heading for the Minister's office, that's what" answered Ron angrily.

The group ran to overtake the speedy Cecilia, but only reached the office when she had gone in. Luna Lovegood was sitting at the secretary's desk, twiddling a squash between her long fingers, a dreamy look in her protuberant eyes. Ron leant on the desk, panting, and asked:

"Luna, you've GOT to let us in."

"Do you have the password?"

"NO."

"Then you can't go in."

"How come the kid can, then?"

"Because she had the password."

"Why did she have the password?" Ron was now confused.

"Because I gave it to her." Ron was bordering insanity. Or so he thought.

"And WHY did you give it to her?"

"Because she gave me squash."

"SQUASH! Oh, yeah, that's right. I bet it has lots of really interesting magical properties, eh?" Ron was now loud and mocking. "Was in the latest issue of The Quibbler, was it?"

"No. I just like squash."

While Ron and Luna were having their little one-sided argument, Pansy, Fred and George were wincing every time they heard a CRASH or a BANG come out of the office. This went on for five minutes until they heard the Minister's loud voice:

"FINE, FINE, I GIVE UP! JUST DON'T KILL ALL MY MY LITTLE PONEYS!"

Rufus Scrimgeour and Cecilia came out of the office, the older man panting and obviously traumatized, the young girl smirking.

Rufus addressed Pansy and Ron.

"All right, Weasley, Finnigan, you get a pay raise of 50 . Just get that demon out of here!"

"AyeAye, sir!" they said as they led Cecilia back to the office.

When they were gone, Scrimgeour turned to Luna:

"Lovegood, get me a cup of tea. Ice cold tea. Lemon flavored. And remind me to cancel Bring Your Children to Work Day."


End file.
